Being a part of a touring band is a unique experience. Your life revolves around being on the road. It’s almost as if time stops while you are on tour. I toured for the past 5 years in one capacity or another. As of a few weeks ago, I am no longer doing so. Now, it’s back to the real world.
This is definitely not an easy transition. Life on the road is so different. It’s something new every day. A different city, venue, people, and food selection are just a few of the things you get used too.
For me, I was touring with my husband. He is still on tour, and now I am home. I shouldn’t complain. I can be here for my kids and family. I have a job I am blessed to work. But it is hard adjusting back into society after having been a part of the music world for so long. It’s hard not seeing my spouse for weeks at a time, especially since we have not spent more than a few days apart in the 7 years we have been together. It’s hard feeling like a single parent because I’m the only one here. It’s hard not being able to talk about how I feel because not many people get it. It’s hard seeing 5 years of work and honing my skills as a merch person basically flushed down the drain. It’s hard talking to him on the phone and imagining all that I am missing. Once again… Tears.
I find myself crying uncontrollably after I speak to my husband on the phone. It’s hard to sleep and eat. I just don’t know how to cope. I don’t know how to express why I feel the way I feel.
I hate change, and this one is big. So…I will do what I do daily. I will get up, follow my routine. Stay strong because that’s what my kids need. I will go to work and smile through the pain. I will keep going. There is nothing else to do. Giving up is not an option here!